Not my portion: We DO NOT beg for love in big big 2025

We’ve all seen this internet personality flood our timelines recently with her relationship drama. I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed such a public dragging over someone crying about their boyfriend online.

Every single day last week, my FYP was serving me at least ten videos about the situation. Just when I thought it had finally died down, more content keeps rolling in. People are still unpacking the shock of it all…

Hey loves,

Who am I talking about, you ask? None other than Klaudia, aka @wavyute, an internet personality I used to watch religiously for her quirky and original content. Aged 26, she was born in Poland but grew up in South London. She also posts videos speaking entirely in Polish, and honestly, I need to know what she’s saying because the language sounds so cool.

Polish is a West Slavic language closely related to Czech and Slovak, with a sprinkle of Latin, German, Belarusian, Ukrainian, and even the occasional Italian, French, or English word. Fascinating, right? I actually tried learning it in my first year and failed miserably. I even wrote an assignment on it, and the way I completely butchered the language still haunts me. I don’t think I could put myself through that again… but anyway, I digress.

Back to Klaudia.

A picture of her sitting on a rapper’s lap resurfaced on the internet and it started going around. Mind you, this was before she started dating her current boyfriend, Dee Green, a 22-year-old rapper from North London.

The picture somehow made its way back to Dee, and I don’t know what went down behind the scenes, but the poor babe ended up having a full-on breakdown on her Instagram story. And when I say breakdown, I mean crying, wailing, red eyes, the whole works. She even made it to TheShadeBorough and you already know, that’s never a good sign.

She publicly apologised to him over the picture, declaring her devotion and insisting she was “all for him.” She was genuinely distressed over the potential end of their relationship. If you haven’t seen it, just search her name on TikTok, and you’ll find exactly what I’m talking about.

She was reprimanding herself over her ‘past mistakes’ and how they had put a strain on her current relationship, expressing how much she wanted to do right by him and prove her loyalty. She even mentioned how he uplifts her and how she’s willing to sacrifice a lot for him.

Now, what these past mistakes are, I couldn’t tell you. But one thing I do know is that she was being way too hard on herself. Nobody is perfect, and we all make questionable choices, but her reaction had me genuinely concerned. It had many of us genuinely concerned.

And just when you thought things couldn’t get any worse, Dee responded later that night.

His grand, heartfelt statement? “I just wanna publicly apologise to absolutely nobody.” Like that is what came out of his mouth.

Sir… what?

1.    That’s not very nice.

2.    Surely, you should apologise.

Men.

Sigh.

So disappointing.

Oh and another diabolical thing was how he posted a picture of her on his story and labelled it ‘My favourite bop ❤️🤞🏾’ (you can see above).

My head spun when I saw that, because how is your so-called lover calling you a ‘bop’, and then you’re even smiling? In case there’s any confusion, ‘bop’ is a derogatory term to refer to someone for being promiscuous or implying they’ve been passed around. I’m not even trying to get all political here, but let’s be so for real, that was out of order. Completely unnecessary. You do not refer to your woman like that. The term carries misogynistic connotations, and there’s nothing funny or acceptable about it.

At this point, the internet collectively agreed that Klaudia could do much better than Dee. Many pointed out that she was the one elevating his music career because let’s be real, did anyone know who he was before they started dating? I still don’t know much about his music, even after all the publicity he’s received.

Klaudia is one of those “my man, my man, my man” type of girls, and while we all want to support love, the concern is whether this is even a healthy relationship.

And let’s not forget the Range Rover she bought for him.

Yes. She bought him a Range.

Meanwhile, a comment I saw had me rolling: “How can you buy your man a Range but haven’t retired your mum who’s cleaning houses?”

OOP.

That one was a bit cheeky, but I get the point. To be fair, we don’t know what she does for her mum behind closed doors, so it’s not our place to assume. But it does highlight a bigger issue, why do some women prioritise men over themselves, their families and families, and just their overall well-being?

(Not me, y’all stay safe though). 🫣 🫣 🫣

The next thing I’m about to discuss is wild: Dee admitted on a live stream that he bought her a fake Louis Vuitton bag, saying, “Because the game’s the game, bro.”

EXCUSE ME?

And there she was, smiling sheepishly like it wasn’t a complete violation.

She tried to justify it by saying he bought her a Cartier watch for the Range, but… yeah. It’s just not looking good, babes.

The thing is, we’ve all seen situations like this before, whether with friends, family, or even ourselves. A man treating a girl like an afterthought while she bends over backwards to prove her love. The truth is, when a man wants you, he makes it clear. There is no guessing, no convincing, no proving yourself worthy.

A few days ago, a leaked phone call surfaced where Klaudia admitted that Dee was keeping another girl as a backup option, because in his words she was “doing too many things wrong.”

May that 'love' never ever find me ooo. That is NOT my portion abeg abeg.

Now, let’s talk about their age gap.

She’s 26, and he’s 22.

Hmm.

We’ve all heard the sayings “age is just a number” and “maturity isn’t determined by age.” Fair enough. But Dee’s apparent lack of emotional intelligence and empathy? Yeah...

And to make matters worse, a TikTok user even claimed they saw Dee in a student accommodation in Birmingham with another girl.

Now, obviously I wasn’t there, so I can’t confirm, but let’s just say… I wouldn’t be surprised.

Listen, I’m not here to give a “how to keep your man” tutorial, because let’s be honest, if a man truly wants you, there’s no tutorial needed. You will know. You won’t have to cry on the internet, apologise for existing, or defend the bare minimum.

Having seen some of their videos, his attitude towards her is shockingly nonchalant and he genuinely looks disgusted by her at times. In one clip I saw, she goes to hug him, but he literally shudders her off.

We’ve all been there. That one guy who treats you like your gum at the bottom of his shoe, but you linger in a cloud of lust and desperation, waiting for him to morph into Prince Charming overnight. But let’s be honest, there comes a moment when you must stand up, realise you’re better than this, and walk away with your dignity intact.

One thing I firmly believe in is that the kind of men you entertain is a strong reflection of your self-worth. Some might come for me over this, but please, sis, sit down and really think about it.

I saw this video of Klaudia expressing how she'd get pregnant for a man under her own particular circumstances which you can see in the video below.

But let's rewind... getting pregnant FOR a man? It's for YOU as well no? Come on girl, wake up👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

If you truly love yourself, would you settle for someone who doesn’t love you back? Someone who doesn’t treasure you the way you deserve to be treasured? Let’s be serious here. Of course, every situation is different, and people endure things for different reasons, but the baseline is this: you should be with someone who respects you, values you, and shares the same morals as you.

Because that’s the foundation of a relationship. I mean you’re supposed to be in it together, not TO                                                                   GETHER.

Girls, I need you to internalise this:

You are the prize.

Not an accessory. Not a backup plan. Not an option. THE prize.

If a man is making you question your worth, your dignity, or your sanity, it’s time to go. And I mean immediately. In fact, sprint. Because the right man will not have you looking like a case study on TikTok.

Klaudia, if you ever read this: girl, we miss the old you. And we’re all rooting for you to remember who you are.

Because a man who buys you a fake bag and publicly refuses to apologise for having you in tears?

That’s not your soulmate. That’s a social experiment.

Off topic, but I recently saw a TikTok where a girl was questioning why some women are so lenient with their boyfriends, yet when a friend slips up, it’s game over. Mate, this one is crazy, because I’ve seen it firsthand, and honestly, some of these girls need deliverance. Then they need to wash their eyes with holy water.

Why is it that a man can cheat, lie, embarrass you publicly, and you’ll still be screaming “But I love him”, yet the moment your friend makes a mistake, you’re ready to tussle and screw face?

I get it. Circumstances matter when deciding whether to cut someone off and all that jazz. Fine, I’m not denying that BUT when girls are out giving unlimited chances to their criminal boyfriends while holding eternal grudges against their friends over minor things… it’s ridiculous.

Babe, you are done. Pack it in. It’s never that serious. Let’s be guided now.

We love to scream “Know your worth, queen!” and “Never settle!”, but has anyone actually stopped to ask why so many women struggle to feel worthy in the first place? Because if self-worth was something we naturally carried, why do we have to repeat it to ourselves like a daily affirmation just to believe it?

Maybe the problem isn’t that women don’t know their worth. Maybe the problem is that they were never taught it. I think this behaviour also stems from having a scarcity mindset. This is the fear or a persistent focus that love is rare, leading people to settle, overstay, or tolerate less than they deserve.

I’ll be honest, I was never really taught how to recognise my worth in relationships. I figured it out on my own. And this isn’t to shade my parents or discredit them in any way, but the truth is, I was never repeatedly reminded of my value in this context. Even now, as an adult, no one has sat me down to have that conversation. Most of what I know, I learnt from social media, my friends and my female cousins.

From the time we’re young, women are taught that love is something to earn. That we must prove ourselves worthy of being wanted. It starts early, the way little girls are praised for being polite and agreeable, always saying please and thank you. The way we’re told to address some random woman as aunty, even though we don’t know her from anywhere. The way teenage girls are reprimanded at home more harshly than their brothers, who will get away with worse. The way grown women are still patronised by entitled men in a world that refuses to let them just be.

By the time love enters the equation, it’s no longer something to receive, it becomes something to achieve.

And within African culture (and others too), marriage is highly revered. It’s not just a partnership; it’s a milestone. A symbol of status. A mark of honour. It’s an achievement. But is that really what it should be?

So when a woman bends over backwards for a man who wouldn’t stretch an inch for her, when she accepts crumbs and convinces herself it’s a feast, when she fights to hold onto a relationship that is draining the life out of her - it’s not because she doesn’t know she deserves better. It’s because, deep down, she has been conditioned to believe that love is something she must work for her.

Could this be why some African women remain devoted to their husbands, even when he is the most wicked man alive?

But let’s be real: Love is not a reward for endurance. It is not a test of how much pain you can take before you earn happiness. Real love does not demand suffering as proof of devotion.

So maybe the question isn’t “Why do women stay in these situations?” Maybe the real question is “Who convinced them that love and struggle go hand in hand?” And more importantly, when do we choose to unlearn it?

Anyways, nuff said.

Girls, please, I beg you, know your worth. You are not some clearance sale item to be bargained over. You are that girl, you’re the winning ticket, the last slice of cake at a family function everyone wants. Walk like it, talk like it, and most importantly, believe it.

Stop giving VIP treatment to people who wouldn’t even line up for you. Stop stressing over nonsensical behaviour. If someone cannot see your value, that is not your problem. It is not your business.

Prioritise yourself, love yourself, and most importantly, be kind to yourself. Practise self-compassion like your life depends on it because, honestly, it kind of does.

Shine so bright they need sunglasses just to look at you.

With love and curiosity,

Just Jenni